youknowwhen

You know when…

 

you have no other choice, but to take ALL three kids to the store…and you give the usual…”I don’t want any funny business. Stay. by. the. cart!” speech…because…there aren’t carts made for three kids and groceries…then you curse the cart makers…we didn’t all stop at 2I’m open to a sidecar attachment…then…before entering…you take one deep breath, fist in the air and say…”LET’S DO THIS!”…when you’ve barely passed through the doors and all you can hear is…”cookie! can we have a cookie? Mommy? Mommy? Mommy? I want a cookie!”…Is the room spinning or am I twirling in an effort to pass out?…you snap back a little too soon and hear…”WAHHH…I WANTED SPRINKLES!”…then you curse the bakery…free cookies…Really?…by now you’re all jacked up on Mommy adrenaline…snapping left and right…hands to yourself… stop fondling the produce…please don’t put the bananas on the floor…NO! I’m not buying you a rutabaga… baby’s crying because you are not feeding her fast enough…while trying to steer the cart with one hand and a wrist…then there’s the  fast approaching someone who feels the need to say…”Boy…you sure do have your hands full!” and you think…thank you captain obvious…but…you want so badly to say, “As president of “the top ten things not to say to a mom”…yeah..we don’t actually think that’s funny.”… instead you take one for the team…smile graciously…and throw out your best courtesy laugh? 

Yeah…that was my day yesterday! I’m still a little frazzled.

What’s your, “you know when?”

Related posts:

10 thoughts on “You know when…

  1. Lisa Handley

    You know when…you’ve come to the sudden, jolting revelation that you are not cut out for one of your “I didn’t sign up for this” duties as a mom. You’ve arrived at a dance recital photo shoot with your daughter in the WRONG costume! Wait…let us backtrack. Friday night, you scrutinize all the small font instructions crammed into the 13-page dance recital manifesto, feeling like your head is spinning & becoming a tad overwhelmed. You don’t even wear foundation yourself, let alone receiving a mandate to buy it for your 7-year old along with blush, lipstick, eye shadow, eye liner, mascara, hair net, hair gel, new tights, etc. etc. etc.! Did I mention that along with your head spinning, your wallet is emptying?! Costumes, tickets (no, your daughter’s performances are not on the same night, & no, your little dancer cannot stay & watch for free nor can you even though you are volunteering backstage), photos, a performance DVD (because you aren’t allowed to record or photograph in the theater)…by now, you are left to wonder, “Will I have enough money left for a post-recital cocktail?!” You start highlighting the details in the packet that pertain to your child while your hubby is laughing at you, but by doing so, you mentally pat yourself on the back & think “ahhh, I guess I am on top of it now!” GUESS AGAIN! You’ve highlighted the photo shoot time slots & classes, stared at those highlighted words more than once – 12:40 Jazz Hip Hop, 12:40 Jazz Hip Hop, 12:40 Jazz Hip Hop. At 12:25 on Saturday, you & your BALLERINA (with the neat little bun you’ve finally managed to perfect) arrive, feeling cool, calm & collected until you see a fellow parent who looks at you with a confused expression, you glance around the room & start noticing familiar little jazz hip hoppers, NOT ballerina! Now YOU are the one who is looking confused & FREAKING OUT on the inside, all the while attempting to remain cool, calm & collected on the surface. DEEP BREATH, smile at that parent, ask them if they will watch your daughter while you run out to the car & grab the correct costume (THANK GOODNESS it was in the car!) All’s well that ends well…you manage to do a quick switcheroo in a back storage room (even having to remove the umpteen bobby pins from your daughter’s gel & hairspray ridden bun & turn it into a sassy, not stiff ponytail!), your daughter manages to take it in stride, unruffled, & the photo shoot takes place without further incident. WHEW! (Oh, did I mention your daughter wasn’t the only one in her class who showed up as a ballerina?! You’re not the only one who’s crazy after all!)

    Reply
    1. krisha Post author

      Lisa: I’m right there with you! Savannah has first dance recital in June. How did I not know how ridiculously expensive this was going to get? LOL @ sassy ponytail. I’ve been given instructions for a “high pony”

      Reply
        1. Lisa Handley

          Hi Krisha,
          Hope you & your family enjoyed a wonderful holiday weekend! Nope, not local to your coast…we are on the opposite coast in California. Our dance studios must exist in parallel universes!

          Reply
    2. Summer

      Are you watching me at Publix???  You crack me up…. I needed that….
      I always talk about the person who designs a grocery cart for more than 2…. and one where siblings don’t have to sit next to each other…… I’m working on a prototype…. in my spare time!

      Reply
  2. Dad

    Funny KR, you have my sense of humor and that’s a good thing. Keep up the good work, with Papa and Gigi’s babies, we miss you, Mo, and them tremendously-

    Reply
  3. Courtney

    DYING! You are hilarious!! Been there too many times to count! And I think we live in the town of Captain “When Are You Due?” and you are like 5 months along and they give you the look like ‘Wow, aren’t you getting big fast! lol” and you have to love the “Wow you sure had them close. That sure is a lot to have them that close. Boy, they are like twin. My goodness, they sure are close.”… Once again, thanks for your observation Miss 1933. 

    Reply

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

You may use these HTML tags and attributes: <a href="" title=""> <abbr title=""> <acronym title=""> <b> <blockquote cite=""> <cite> <code> <del datetime=""> <em> <i> <q cite=""> <strike> <strong>